November 3, 2008

August 29, 2008

You are about to feast your eyes on the worst posed paparazzi pics in history. Heidi Montag went to the grocery store and did the old melon pose, which has already been done and done much better. After seeing Traci’s melons, Heidi might want to stick with the apples. For a chick whose entire career is posing for the paps, couldn’t she think of something a little more original? I mean come on, this is your full-time job! Have some pride! Is she seriously reading the ingredients to houseplant stuff?? Gimmie a break… a) Nobody does that. b) You can’t read.

Yeah yeah I know, she’s the famous one, I’m not. But come on!! That move went out in ‘96.

June 18, 2008

After launching her un-successful clothing line Heidiwood, reality show ho Heidi Montag is now pushing for MTV to air a live broadcast of her wedding. Yes, you read that right. Their dream is to have the wedding in the Virgin Islands, give all of the guests custom-made watches, and have U2 perform. Good luck with that. In the meantime here are some pics of Heidi Montag showing off her sexy legs.

May 29, 2008

Here are some blatantly staged but hot pics of Heidi Montag hitting the beach yesterday courtesy of PacificCoastNews. Heidi enjoyed the beautiful weather and showed off her ‘hills’, which IMO are superior to Audrina Patridge’s. I’ve never actually watched The Hills or Laguna Beach, because, you know, I’m not a 14 year old girl, but Heidi Montag always struck me as a mean-ass cold-hearted bitch. And I kinda like it.

Hollywood Hint: Hey Heidi, if you don’t want it to be painfully obvious you’re posing for the paparazzi, try not changing outfits halfway through your shoot.